Turn Awkward Small Talk Into Real Conversation: The Power of Conversational Threads
Picture this: You’re at a conference lunch, maybe the Lean Construction Institute Congress, and you find yourself at a table full of complete strangers. If you’re an extrovert, you might think “Wonderful!” If you’re an introvert, you’re probably wondering if it’s too late to retreat to your room. And if you’re like me, you’re thinking “This table is definitely a bagel and not a croissant.”
If this scenario gives you mild anxiety, let me introduce you to a simple technique that can transform flat small talk into engaging conversation: conversational threads.
What Are Conversational Threads?
Instead of giving one-word answers that kill momentum, you weave multiple topics into your responses that others can easily grab onto and explore.
For example, when someone asks “Where are you from?” instead of just saying “Sacramento, California” and letting the conversation die there, try something like:
“I’m from Sacramento! I just moved there with my wife from San Diego, and we have loved all the fresh produce in the central valley farm stands and have been doing quite a bit of our own gardening too actually, at least when we aren’t driving up to Tahoe to go skiing or river tubing down the Truckee river!”
Look at all those conversation threads! They could now ask about:
- Either Sacramento or San Diego
- Farm stands
- Gardening
- Skiing
- Tahoe
- River tubing
And I’d happily talk about any of those topics.
How to Apply This at Congress (or Any Networking Event)
If conversations are going flat, ask yourself: Am I giving people threads to work with? Are my answers opening doors or closing them?
And here’s a bonus tip if you’re anxious about saying the wrong thing in a group of experts, say for example around all that Lean expertise at Congress: People love to feel smart and demonstrate their knowledge. If you say something that isn’t quite right (or is wildly wrong), it’s actually a great way to get them talking.
Try this: “Oh, you work for Boldt? I heard you guys just started using the Last Planner System®, right?”
That (potentially erroneous) statement is going to get them talking. Plus, you might just learn something—nurture your growth mindset!
The Bottom Line
Whether you’re navigating networking events or building relationships on project sites, conversational threads help transform surface-level exchanges into meaningful connections. So next time someone asks you a simple question, give them something to work with.
P.S. If the bagel comment confused you, check out my previous article about being a croissant, not a bagel—it’s all about inclusive networking and making others feel welcome in group conversations.